Navigating the dating world can be difficult, especially when determining someone’s true intentions. Unfortunately, some people are not looking for a genuine connection but are just interested in a casual hook-up. This can leave individuals feeling confused and hurt when they realise that the person they thought was interested in them only wanted sex—knowing the signs to look out for to protect yourself from getting used and, ultimately, to find someone genuinely interested in building a meaningful relationship. We explore common behaviours that indicate someone is only interested in a physical connection and how to identify them.


They Just Want Sex If…


They cannot keep their hands to themselves

One of the most obvious signs that someone is only interested in you for sex is that they cannot keep their hands to themselves. When you are alone, they spend more time touching than talking. Physical touch is important in any relationship, but when someone constantly feels you, it can be a red flag that they are only interested in your body.


They do not respect your boundaries

Another sign that someone is only interested in sex is that they do not respect your boundaries. They do not respect your sexual limits and dating rules. They keep trying even after you ask them to stop and never care too much if you get upset. This behaviour is disrespectful and can also be harmful if someone continues to push your boundaries.


They are a tell-all

If someone is only interested in sex, they may brag to their friends about what the two of you have done (or have not done). This behaviour shows that they are not interested in building a real connection with you but rather using you for their gratification.


A Kiss is not just a kiss

If all someone is trying to do is cop feels, get into your pants, or go up your shirt, you are most certainly dealing with someone more interested in your body than your mind. When kissing, pay attention to their actions. If they become an octopus the second the two of you touch lips, it’s a sign that they are more interested in physical intimacy than anything else.


They keep you in the closet

If someone only wants a physical relationship, they may never want to date you. Instead, they may prefer to come to your house and “hang out.” They are not interested in building a real relationship with you but want sex.


They steer clear from places where other potential conquests hang out

If someone avoids places or situations where other people might see them with you, it can be a sign that they are not interested in a real relationship. They may be worried that being seen with you will ruin their chances with other potential conquests.


They only remember your name

If someone has never gotten to know you, it’s a sign that they are not interested in a real relationship. They may only remember your name and a few basic details about you, but they are interested in something other than learning more.


They have a reputation for being a player

If you are considering getting involved with someone who has a habit of using people, you need to stop and think about why they would treat you any differently. Because you are not like all the other people, right? Please, that is what all the other people thought, too.


They score, then shoot off

One of the most telling signs that someone is only interested in hooking up is when they take off right after sex. For example, suppose they habitually run out the door the second they get what they want and never seem interested in sitting around and talking or spending time with you afterwards. In that case, it indicates that they’re only after your body.


Forgetting important dates or occasions

When your partner does not remember your birthday, anniversary, or any other important event, it may mean they are not emotionally invested in you. Someone who cares about their partner will remember important dates and try to celebrate them.


Only around when convenient

You can tell if your partner isn’t looking for anything serious if they only contact you when they want to hang out or hook up. On the other hand, a person interested in a real relationship will try to be a part of your life and spend time with you even when it’s not convenient.


Avoids talking about the future

If your partner avoids discussing your future or seems uncomfortable, it’s a sign that they’re not interested in a serious relationship. In contrast, when someone is invested in a relationship, they discuss their plans together.


Does not introduce you to friends or family

If your partner is not interested in introducing you to their close friends or family members, it could be a sign that they don’t see a future with you. On the other hand, a person who is invested in a relationship will want their partner to be a part of their social circle and introduce them to the important people in their life.


If you’re looking for a serious relationship, recognise the signs that someone is only interested in hooking up. While accepting that someone you care about may not feel the same way can be difficult, be honest and not settle for less than you deserve. Remember that you can choose who you let into your life, and it’s okay to walk away from a relationship that doesn’t meet your needs. By staying true to yourself and valuing your worth, you’ll attract someone interested in an honest, meaningful connection.

Image: Uncanny Valley, Adobe Stock

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